Turning tortoises into hares

Rory Sabbatini got a bad rap a few years back when he left Ben Crane in his fuming wake because Crane was moving with the speed of sleepy sloth.

And slow play in golf came to the fore the other week when Jonathan Byrd did anything but fly around the course in the final round of a PGA Tour's opening event.
http://www.montrealgazette.com/sports/Slow+play+killing+golf+game/5974978/story.html

But slow golf amongst the pros is one thing - it's slow golf on your local course that can do your head in and create Sabbatini-esque explosions which include deliberately hitting up on the group ahead, yelling abuse and generally getting so wound up your round turns to custard.

I recently watched a group spend at least 10 minutes looking for a lost ball out of bounds before one of the group ran back to the tee to play a third shot. The net result: two furious groups backed up on the fourth tee.

I've always maintained amateurs need to play by different rules to pros and this was a case in point. If you can't find your ball out of bounds, just play it like a lateral hazard, take a drop and get on with it.

Everyone rabbits on about golf being gentleman's game and how honouring the rules and self-regulation are critical to its integrity. Bollocks (unless you're playing for money or a trophy). If golf is going to continue to attract new players in the 21st century it needs to battle a far greater enemy - lack of time.

Unless you're retired, you're probably time poor and I for one don't want to spend over four and a half hours playing 18 holes when I know I could get round in a threesome in less than three and a half hours if there was no wannbe PhilMickleson in front of us.

You can't do much about idiots who phaff around over three-foot putts and take 20 practice swings but you can make your own round go faster by taking a more relaxed approach to the restrictive rules of golf.

I've always maintained all amateurs should be allowed to place the ball to avoid hitting out of someone's divot, or from an unraked footprint in the bunker - the game is hard enough without having your round ruined by someone else's selfishness and laziness. If an 18-handicapper moves the ball a few feet what does it matter? It will hardly alter the score and can make things run more smoothly and stress-free.

So imagine how rapt I was to see the venerable Golf Digest website echo my thoughts. Because they have much better technology than me, I'll let them take up the story.

http://www.golfdigest.com/golf-instruction/2011-10/photos-reasonable-rules

So next time you're out playing, go easy on yourself and have fun - after all the game is not meant to turn you into a mental wreck.